What exactly do you learn from Total Transformation? In other words, how does the program work?
If you think that you’ll change your kid’s behaviors without changing your own behavior, then whatever you do, don’t buy Total Transformation. As we go through the DVD’s and CD’s, it becomes abundantly clear that James Lehman is out to teach us as parents to change how we deal with our children, which in turn will make the child change.
Mr. Lehman states over and over that the main reason that kids are disobedient, out-of-control, and abusive is they don’t have problem solving skills, and acting out is the way they get through life, instead of learning to problem solve. Mr. Lehman shows us many different skills we can start using as parents in order to help our kids learn, but you’ve got to want to work at it! Nothing happens overnight!
There are many different permissive styles that parents have in raising their children, and most of them are ineffective. Some of these include the martyr, the screamer, bottomless pockets, over-negotiator, and the perfectionist. These are the roles that we as parents need to change if we’re going to help our kid to problem solve, and get our house back to normal. Mr. Lehman goes over each of these roles and cures for them in the Total Transformation, and I’m going to touch on most if not all of them in my reviews of the program.
Here’s the truth – you probably need to change your behavior. You can’t expect to fix your child if you’re not willing to learn and grow yourself. If that sounds like something you won’t mind doing, then Total Transformation might be for you.
Next up – The Total Transformation Workbook.
What Is The Total Transformation?
The Total Transformation is a parenting program designed for parents of difficult children – defiant, out-of-control, abusive, etc. It is for parents of kids with all kinds of behavioral problems ranging from ADD and ADHD to ODD, Autism, and bipolar disorder. The main jist of the Total Transformation is that defiant, out-of-control children are that way because they don’t know how to problem solve: when they act out, they get their way and they don’t have to face their problems. As parents, our job is to train the up, and give them the skills they need to solve their own problems. That’s what Total Transformation does.
Who Created The Total Transformation?
The creator of the Total Transformation is James Lehman, a therapist with a Masters Degree in Social Work. For three decades James Lehman has worked with troubled teens, younger children with behavior problems, families and professionals who live with, educate, treat and assist in managing them. In public schools, residential treatment centers, private schools, and numerous outpatient and inpatient settings, James has developed an approach to managing children and adolescents which challenges them to learn to solve social problems without hiding behind a facade of disrespectful, obnoxious, or abusive behavior.
Next post – How much does Total Transformation cost, and what’s included?
I was first introduced to The Total Transformation by my neighbor. She is the mother of an eight year old autistic child and she told me that it was doing wonders in helping her to parent him. She said that she thought it might help with our five strong-willed kiddos and that I should check it out. I finally agreed, and I’m really glad I did.
What I discovered was a program by a guy named James Lehman, who has a masters in social work, and has worked with troubled teens and children for many years. The thing that struck me right away was that Mr. Lehman was very honest and to-the-point – he tells it like it is – and I like that. His observations are simple, and the tools that he gives you to work with the kids are doable. His main idea, as far as I could see at first glance, was this:
Children need to learn to problem-solve
Mr. Lehman’s assertion is that kids don’t know how to problem-solve, and that’s why they act out in inappropriate ways. It’s a coping mechanism they’ve developed to force someone else to solve the problem at hand for them. What he does with The Total Transformation Program is to give us as parents the tools we need to train our kids to solve their problems.
It’s as simple as that – most parents are pretty good parents, and they really want to help their kids, but they just don’t know how. What James Lehman does is teach us how, and what I’d like to do in this Total Transformation portion of this blog is to share some of the things I’ve learned from the program.
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